Our CEO advises you to read the disclaimer before proceeding to read this article.
Antarctic Astronaut Dr Ashtray Knight was last seen on the 30th of February 2020. As the hour hand landed on the 25th hour and the minute and the second hand raced on to the 69th mark, a roaring thunder rocked through the South Pole Launchpad Complex.
As the penguin on-lookers stared in dismay, fearing the heat to melt their habitat, Dr Knight wondered from the accelerating rocket, what on Earth were these penguins doing so deep into the Antarctic mainland. Little did he know that a massive portion of his campaign was funded by a penguin drug cartel and half the people in the mission control room were actually penguins.
The first five minutes of the ascent was unremarkable. A little twirl, a mini swirl, some negligible whirls and two little beautiful girls were all that grabbed the attention. The girls were Dr Knight’s twins who had exploded into tears as soon as they grasped the reality that they may never see their father ever again.
As soon as the rocket cleared the ionosphere, the troubles began. Knight spotted a Dyson sphere gradually taking shape in front of his eyes. Even worse, the Dyson sphere wasn’t even forming around the sun, rather around another star which had somehow intruded into the solar system. He wasn’t even sure whether to call the solar system that or not anymore. For one, the system was more bistellar than simply solar.
Albeit gently troubling, none of this was severe enough to mandate a change in the mission plan. Today’s mission was one that the whole world had been waiting for and Ashtray wasn’t going to lower the expectations. His mission was special. It was a giant leap. But for him, it wasn’t a small step.